#1: The Best Workday is Sunday

Get a little done on Sunday, have a little fun on Friday. Write an email on Sunday, watch a YouTube video on Thursday.

#2: A Note To My Remaining Students

#3: “Your chocolate chip cookies are better than you mother’s.”

After twelve years of marriage, seventeen years together, my husband says to me, “Your chocolate chip cookies are better than you mother’s.” It’s an otherwise standard evening: we’re in the kitchen after dinner, I’m at the sink rinsing dough from the bowl of the stnad mixer, he’s about to collect our four-year-old for his bath.

To understand the gravity of his pronouncement is to know that my mother is in fact famous for her chocolate chip cookies–famous, at least, in a certain set that includes my father, their various neighbors, plumbers who need extra motivation to finish a project, every friend of my youth, my own son. She bakes them to make the house smell good when my sister is coming to visit or when a realtor is coming through with prospective buyers. She wields them as if they possess a kind of supernatural healing power, an ability to relieve back surgery pain or the fallout of childbirth or broken-heartedness.

Case in point: At eighteen, a freshman in college, I went to Philadelphia to visit friends. They introduced me around the gathering of new acquaintances in their form common room, and while I didn’t expect these people to say, “oh, yes, hello, we’ve heard so much about you,” I also didn’t expect it when they actually said, “oh, yes, hello, we’ve heard so much about your mother–the one with the cookies.”

The truth is, I bake chocolate chip cookies from the same recipe as my mother; the one on the back of the Nestle Tollhouse bag, with only slight modifications. And yet, my mother’s are on another plane: fluffier, richer, more substantial. It seems not a coincidence, then, that the only person ever to insist that mine are superior to hers is the person I married.

He is flush with boyishness now, sneaking another cookie. “Objectively better,” he says, before walking out of the kitchen to get our kid in the bath.

These are the thins that aren’t marriage exactly–aren’t part of the big agreement we made when we got married, aren’t any of the millions of small negotiations and commitments we continue to make as we stay married. They are something else, some kind of supportive tissue, as if the marriage is the primitive, rudimentary joint of bone to bone, and then these moments are the tendons, lithe fibers, holding it all together, allowing it all to move. — by Kelsey Motes-Conners

#1: Dunning-Kruger effect

Dunning-Kruger effect, in psychology, a cognitive bias whereby people with limited knowledge or competence in a given intellectual or social domain greatly overestimate their own knowledge or competence in that domain relative to objective criteria or to the performance of their peers or of people in general.

#2: The Secret To a Fight-Free Relationship

“They noticed that by waiting, they could avoid the pain and gamesmanship of impulsive arguments; in the midst of a fight, they were too preoccupied with “winning” to attempt to solve problems. For Cutler, the distance often brought clarity. By the time she had read through the paper in her desk drawer to prepare for an upcoming contract talk, she would deem some of the entries too trivial to raise.”

#3: Masters of Love

A very interesting article, factual article, that proves that kindness is really the foundation for a long-lasting relationship

#4: Confidence swimming pool

This post really warmed my heart. If only we could cheer for each other like this, with no envy, no hidden-agenda, no ulterior motives… what a different world would this be.

#1: Modern Love: An Anxious Person Tries to Be Chill

“Henry didn’t need things to be dramatic to feel alive because he paid attention to the small details that make life feel miraculous. His capacity for delight, his seemingly boundless sense of wonder, was one of the first things I loved about him. I just didn’t know it at the time.”

#2: Being Brave Is…

Brave is matching your insides and outsides.
If one wants to ride and does, that’s brave.
If one does not want to ride and doesn’t- that’s brave.
Actions are not inherently brave- the honoring of the inner compass instead of the outer expectation is the braveness.
Brave cannot be judged by the crowd. Sometimes we are the only one who knows we’ve been brave.
And that is enough.
That is everything.

#3: “Wishes for sons” by Lucille Clifton

i wish them cramps.
i wish them a strange town
and the last tampon.
i wish them no 7-11.

i wish them one week early
and wearing a white skirt.
i wish them one week late.

#4: “My dad… he always cared”

Just a good ‘ol pieces of heart warming news. There are people who care.

#1: Beth Wilkinson – Lindsay Magazine

“If you are never getting noes, then you are probably not aiming high enough!” Beth is the founder, editor and creative director of Lindsay, based in Naarm (Melbourne), Australia. In this brief talk, she shares seven lessons that she has learned since starting her magazine: make something with love, pitch with care, never ever take silence as a no, don’t take noes to heart, don’t set your own limitations, it’s not meant to be easy and be proud of your successes.

#2: Diversify your interests

Eric Eliasson and Lara Mitra interviewed several liders to understand what makes a successful career. While there is good advice there, there’s one that particularly caught my attention:

“We have never expected more from our careers. Jobs purport to give us everything: belonging, purpose, meaning, community, and an identity. Buying into this mindset can lead to unhealthy results: when work does not go well, you will feel unwell. For me, the key to avoiding this cycle is to diversify the things I am passionate about and dedicate my time to. Kat Cole, former President and COO at Focus Brands, shared in our interview how putting more time and energy towards volunteer work made her happier and ultimately more effective. By diversifying, I lower the stakes for what work needs to do for me — and all my human needs can be fulfilled with a variety of pursuits.”

Which reminded me of a sound advice given by Neal A. Maxwell: “[…] some of us neglect to develop multiple forces of satisfaction. When one of the wells upon which we draw dries up through death, loss or status, disaffection, or physical ailment, we then find ourselves very thirsty because, instead of having multiple sources of satisfaction in our lives, we have become too dependent upon this or upon that. How important it is to the symmetry of our souls that we interact with all [principles], so that we do not become so highly specialized that, if we are deprived of one source of satisfaction, indeed we are in difficulty. It is possible to be incarcerated within the prison of one principle. We are less vulnerable if our involvements […] are across the board. We are less vulnerable if we care deeply about many principles—not simply a few.”

#1: Would You Jump In to Stop an Assault?

I’ve always found it very intriguing the disconnect that we all seem to have between the person we think we are and the person we really are. We all would like to believe that we will jump in to stop a bully, but in reality, when push comes to shovel, very few people have the courage to act. I don’t think that makes us (the by-standers that we all have been at some point or another) bad persons. In any case, it makes us sane…that self-preservation instinct, fight or flight, right?

However, what it’s admirable are those people who, despite their fears and their disadvantages, still choose to stand up for and stand by with those who need it.

#2: Kindness counts

Whenever asked what my core values are, I always say kindness and gratitude. Never underestimate the impact that a little act of kindness can have on other people’s lives.

#3: I’ll Never Let Myself Love a Job Again

This was an interesting reading to me because I can identified with how she was feeling. I too have found myself overly attached to a job, only to find that in the end a job is a job and nothing more. I don’t believe there’s anything wrong in loving what you do; the problem is loving the job itself. Recently, I too have come to the acceptance that I should not let myself love a job again.

#1: The Rebirth Of Ann Mashburn

I am obsessed with Ann Mashburn. She might be the epitome of classiness. I particularly love what a good example she is of aging gracefully. Now, I am not commenting on her appearance/age, but I just love how she embraces her grays, her wrinkles, her age. Such a great example to girls/women all over the world that aging is not something to avoid at all costs (quite literally) rather than owning it and embracing it.

#2: Office Inspiration

Kelle Hampton is my discovery of the week. Isn’t her office/house decor/style soo refreshing? Plus… just see the themed parties she throws. She nails it!

#1: “The Hill We Climb” by Amanda Gorman

This week was President Biden’s Inauguration. Though I am not an American, I felt the relief and the peace of this Inauguration Day. After all the craziness that has happened since Election Day, I had felt on the edge of my seat holding my breath worrying about towards what side the scale would tip. But the day finally came and oh boy, it was good. But what left an impression on me, as I’m sure it did on the whole U.S., was Amanda Gorman’s poem, “The Hill We Climb.” It was just what, not only Americans, but the world needed to here for the very times we face.

#2: When women don’t speak

This is an amazing article that summarizes the research that has been conducted at BYU (proud Alumna over here!) regarding the dynamics of women within groups where male presences is prevalent. Dr. Karpowitz (he was actually a teacher of mine, good ol’ Poli Sci) mentions, “some of my most impressive students have been women here at BYU whose core interest is, How do I simultaneously prioritize my family and my scholarly work? I never hear male students talk like that. Ever. And yet that balance . . . ought to be just as important for men.” I particularly enjoyed the 7 ways to elevate women’s voices. As the article concluded, “…we have lots of learning and unlearning to do.”

#3: 7 Strange Questions That Help You Find Your Life Purpose by Mark Mason

This week was just full of exquisitely well-written articles. This article was a needed reminder of what we should be pursuing with our lives. Sometimes we, myself included, get lost on the day-to-day grunt work that we loose sight of what really makes our body tingle with excitement. You really need to read this, and then… do something about it. I know I will!