Change; how to even begin? Change is scary, hard, and challenging. A few weeks ago I found myself caught in the painful situation we call change. In fact, 2016 started for me with a bunch of things changing quickly and unexpectedly, more things than I’d have wanted to.
I consider myself the kind of person who feels comfortable with routines and traditions. Anyone who knows me, knows that I’m not the adventurous and spontaneous kind of girl. Instead, I’m the kind of girl that loves to plan and calculate things. I love the comfort that comes from knowing what to expect, because knowing what’s going to happen makes me feel more in control. More powerful. More prepared. Life, however, can be very ironic. One day you are in one place and then the next day you find yourself in the most random and unexpected place. Isn’t it how it works?
I believe the reason I struggle with embracing new things is that I get attached very quickly and quite deeply to things/people. I’m not a trusting person in general (or even at all) so when I find something or someone who I can confide in and rely on, I hold onto it. However, most often than not, people change and move on, things come and go and in reality very few things stay the same. Change can cause anxiety and physical pain, trust me, I’ve been there. Times when you cannot fall asleep because you cannot comprehend why this had to happen. Or waking up with an accelerated heartbeat because you’re too worried things won’t work out. It’s a real struggle.
A few weeks ago, when I was wallowing in self-pity, someone said something to me that left a mark in my brain. “You have to let it go.” A short, yet powerful, phrase. Unfortunately, this is easier said than done. Surprisingly, it also works like a charm. Let it go. When you’re about to fall in this i-hate-everything hole try redirecting your thoughts to why this new opportunity is good for you. Focus on the promising stuff and forget about the rest. Allow yourself to miss the comfortable routines, the close friends who walked away, the gone opportunities, but move on quickly- it’s very easy to get stuck there. Don’t deny yourself the opportunity to welcome new things that could change your life.
Time helps too. There are two things you need to know about time. First, time washes away the sadness and pain. So take the time to enjoy the new things you have. Take time to learn to love the changes you’re experiencing. Second, eventually you’ll get used to anything (even if you thought you never would).
See? that’s the thing about change, it’s truly beautiful. The best things that I’ve ever had, or will ever have, have come from swift, unexpected, and painful changes. You can think of change as a burden (it will become just that if you let it bitter your life), or you can think of it as a clean slate. A new beginning. A new opportunity to get it right. A start of something wonderful.
I’ll choose the latter, because really, life’s too short to long for things already gone and for opportunities missed. Life was never meant to be lived in the past, but rather to be looked forward with hope and optimism.